Let me first say there is NO easy, or perfect or care free day with D. Yes sometimes there are days where sugars are great, and you feel good, but do you have any idea how much work that takes? You still have to check your sugar 10 to 15x a day, still have to count carbs, weigh food, insert infusion sites, and Dexcom sensors, still have to worry about the what if of it all.
There is no day without D. Period.
Sadly the tools we have while we are beyond grateful for them, are still crude and not always perfect. Meters are off, sensors don't work, pump sites fail, insulin goes bad. But there is one thing that we need that will always work. Always make our days a little easier, and give us something to smile about.
I don't pretend that this disease is easy to understand, hell before Justice got diagnosed I understood it only half as well I do now only because my grandmother is a type 1. But otherwise I would be clueless.
But that's just it. I don't expect you to know what a basal is, or a bolus. Or understand how pasta can be demonic, or why Justice running outside for only 15 minutes now has as him balled up on the couch lifeless.
I don't expect you to have the technical talk with me, I may have with some other D moms. But I don't need you for that.
I need you to let me know you're there to listen.
I need you to hug me when I'm crying.
I need you to offer to grab a juice box.
I need you to text me that you're there if I need you.
I need you to offer to come over and help me since I haven't slept in a week.
I need you to let me vent.
I need you to not tell me how strong my son is.
I need you to not tell me how strong I am.
I need you to not brush off the events of my day by saying "it will be ok".
I need you to understand the seriousness of this disease, even if not the ins and outs.
I need you to understand I don't sleep for fear of losing my son.
I need you to understand my life is not all rainbows and fairies.
I need you to understand every day, 24/7/365 I must pierce my sons skin, see his blood, and administer life saving medicine.
I need you to support me.
I need you to support my son.
I need you to support my cause.
I need you to be there, like you were before this disease entered our lives.
I am beyond grateful have gained members of the D.O.C as my friends, family and support system. A group of people I'd be lost without and probably not as great a pancreas as I am. But that in no way means I don't need those who have been there since B.D (Before Diabetes).
I need to know we are still friends. We are still family. We are still each others backbones, no matter how much more complicated things have gotten these last 2 1/2 years.
I fear everyday a sugar will take my sons life, or his eyes in 20 years. Every day is a battle and one that I cannot afford to lose. One I will NOT lose.
I am scared. I am tired. I am exhausted. I yearn for the days before...
My life has changed. Justice's life has changed. In more ways than one, but that doesn't mean our need for you has.
If you ever doubted that, this is your letter of confirmation.
So when you see a facebook post about how bad our day was, or you notice I haven't tweeted in a week, call me, text me, email me. Reach out and ask if things are ok.
Cause honestly, by you doing that, they will be better than they were 5 minutes before.
Support Me. Please.