So I wasn't going to blog today, going through some personal stuff and just kind of not feeling it.
But Justice told me yesterday after something pretty awesome happened, "You gotta blog this!".
So here I is.
Yes, I'm not obeying grammer or proper english today.
So here goes.
Saturday I was feeling like SHIT, ladies time (hmmm I seem to be in sync with one of my favorites), anyway, I heard the boys wake up, I grumpily (bitchily?) got up to see what Js bg was, and if they could handle breakfast.
Well Justice had already counted the carbs for his waffles, agave syrup, vitamins and yogurt and had pre bolused.
Ok. 3rd time this week I'm not surprised, proud yes. Surprised no.
I asked the kids if I could go back to my room and rest, my door would be open (our house is small living room right off of bedroom), juice, meter, tabs on coffee table, and Synsyre knows to come get me if needed for anything D related.
I wasn't alseep really just resting, I needed it. The cramps and headache were unbearable.
I hear from the kitchen "Maaaaa! I'm 145 I'm having a protein bar, bolused for 25 graaaams!".
I smiled, then hollered back "Good job! Give Synny one too!".
Eyes closed again.
"Hey mommy, can we have hot pockets for lunch!".
I hate these things. They're soooo good but sooo bad for you, but Biggah bought the fucking army pack, so may as well.
I let them know it would be fine and start adding carbs, but before I could holler Justice comes in "I'm having 2 hot pockets, and a bag of Lorna Doones, that's 90 grams, ok?".
I was in awe. I smiled, praised him and said enjoy.
I got up to check on them and he was drinking a juice.
"I was just coming to tell you, I felt low and I was xx (I don't remember exact #), so I grabbed a juice".
I grabbed his face and kissed.
I told him how amazing he is and how unbelievable proud I am of him!
I said I know George and Scott would be so proud too! (His D amigos).
He said "Well I have Diabetes, its what I gotta do! Mom! I'm really doing it!".
My eyes welted up. It was tears of joy and sadness. Joy for what he had done but sadness that it had to be.
Yesterday something else happened that made was sooo cool.
Justice wanted an orange, he said "I think its like 29 grams, what do you think?". I thought 25.
So we grabbed our food scale (it gives actual carb count when you enter code for X food.)
When I tell you my baby was JUMPING in the air he was. He was soo proud of himself, it boosted his confidence in a way I've never seen.
I peeled the orange, and he ate it.
Juice all over his face. A mess. I think there was pulp in his hair!
He's growing up alright, but he will always be my baby.